Quiet, patient, and felt all the way down to your soul, writer-director Walter Thompson-Hernandez’s “If I Go Will They Miss Me” is locked into its emotional rhythm from the get-go. Set in the Watts neighborhood of South Los Angeles, the film follows 12-year-old Lil Ant (Bodhi Dell), a sensitive artistic kid who’s trying to make sense of the world just as his father, Big Ant (J. Alphonse Nicholson), re-enters his life after being released from prison. You can feel not just the physical distance between them, but also the emotional, generational, and spiritual.
Since Lil Ant has a hard time connecting with his dad, he instead retreats into his imagination. He starts seeing surreal spectral visions of other boys drifting through his neighborhood. These moments are handled with so much care by Hernandez. They’re not played for shock or fantasy, but as a visual language for memory, absence, and longing.
The film blends gritty social realism with touches of the magical in a way that feels natural. This is simply how a creative, thoughtful kid like Lil Ant understands the world. His growing obsession with Pegasus and Greek mythology becomes a way for him to process ideas about escape, legacy, and what it means to grow up under the weight of expectations you didn’t choose.
Big Ant’s storyline is just as compelling, if not more quietly devastating. He’s a man trying to figure out how to be present after years of absence while also wrestling with who he used to be and who he’s supposed to become. The film does a really thoughtful job exploring fatherhood and masculinity without spelling everything out because Thompson-Hernández clearly respects his audience. You can feel Big Ant’s frustration in the small moments of uncertainty, emotional stiffness, his desire to do right by his son even when he doesn’t know how. The idea of the absent father is central here, but the film treats it with nuance and compassion rather than judgment or cliches.
One of the film’s strongest elements is how rooted it is in the Watts community. The neighborhood isn’t just a backdrop, but becomes part of the story’s emotional fabric. The urban landscape is used both literally and metaphorically, especially with the constant roar of airplanes passing in the skies overhead. Living under the LAX flight path becomes this quietly powerful symbol of escape, with the sound of planes always going somewhere else and always out of reach. There’s so much possibility yet so few opportunities, and so many young men like Lil Ant are stuck in the same place while the world passes by.
The film is dense with ideas but it never feels cluttered. There’s a nice repetition throughout the script, with moments and images echoing each other in a way that feels intentional and lyrical. The imagery is beautiful without being flashy, and the performances all feel grounded and sincere.
What really stayed with me is how the film actively moves away from the expected narratives of trauma. While the story doesn’t ignore hardship, Thompson-Hernández chooses to focus on resilience, imagination, and hope through the eyes of a young Black boy allowed to be curious, dreamy, and emotionally complex.
Gentle and honest, “If I Go Will They Miss Me” feels like a love letter to a place of community and to the fragile, complicated bonds between parents and children. What a beautifully realized film.
By: Louisa Moore
Screen Zealots 